Swirlies: Hooker Habits

Last week, Holly and I were driving home from Swans and I was taking my usual shortcuts. There's a five-way intersection that can take awhile if you (invariably) get there at the wrong time. There's a network of side streets leading up to the five-way and I used to usually take the side street immediately before the intersection. A left turn, down a block, right at the stop sign, then left and I'm back to the 'normal', non-shortcut route. Now, what makes this route interesting is the number of hooker hangouts I drive past.

The first hangout is along Government Street. That one is fine, since it's a wide street and they're easy to ignore. (Though, I've made the mistake of glancing over before and regretting it; some of them are just nasty ugly.) Driving along Government can be amusing because once in awhile you see a vehicle stopped, their intentions obvious.

The next hangout is along the shortcut mentioned above. This one's a little more iffy, since it involves a stop sign. That's the reason I said I 'used to' usually take the street immediately before the five-way intersection. There have been times where I've waited at the stop sign to turn right, and a hooker popped out of her spot and started meandering towards me. Umm, no. Damn car, hurry up so I can turn! I started taking a new shortcut that starts sooner, after observing a few other people do the same. The good thing about this new shortcut is that it doesn't involve any stopping in the Hookers' Zone of Attraction.

Anyway, last week, I was driving along this shortcut and following a guy also taking the shortcut... or so I assumed. A little before the hooker hangout, he slowed down and cruised until he passed. When he got to the post-shortcut turn, instead of continuing on the normal route, he turned onto another side street that would let him circle back. I looked over at Holly and mentioned this and we both laughed. I wondered if he didn't stop earlier because I was behind him or because he didn't see his favourite girl? Maybe he didn't want to make it too obvious? I briefly contemplated following him around to see what he did. Either that or stop at the corner and wait to see if he circled around. The only problem with the latter is that a hooker might get the wrong impression.

This then inspired the following conversation, which may or may not be exactly as written. Actually, I'd be very surprised if it was anything close to what was written.

Holly: I wonder how hookers get to work? I mean, do they take the bus or drive or what?
me: Well, I'd probably say their pimp. In a pimp-mobile or something.
H: But then what if they don't have a pimp.
me: You mean like freelance hookers? I don't think they stay that way for long. Maybe they commute with other hookers, like a carpool? Carpooling hookers!
H: Haha! They could start a union!
me: Hehe, unionized hookers.
H: Carpooling Unionized Hookers!
me: Then they could go on strike.
H: Do you think they'd strike during the day or night?
me: Well, I'd think during the night, since that would most affect their clients. That would be funny, hookers standing on the street corner with signs, NOT soliciting.

It kind of degenerated after that, not that it could really degenerate very far...